Stepping Back

Oh boy. A month ago. I was very stressed then. Taking on too much.

A couple weeks after my last post, we had some training at work. Although I had to act as SmartBoard Girl for the presenter, I mostly got to take things easy. Interestingly enough, the topic of the training was mental health. What to do about students who present with learning difficulties due to mental health issues. (No, it wasn't, "What to do if your job is causing you mental health problems.") Here's what I learned though. Adult Education students often present with mental health and other difficult issues, but that we as teachers should remember two things: our students want to learn or they wouldn't show up at our doorsteps, and as teachers, our responsibility is to adapt our teaching to meet their learning needs, not to make them "well". Ok, I knew that, but spending 6 hours in a room with 15 other people who were all focusing on the same thing was very helpful. I'm feeling better now.

Oh Man

Oh man. Stress. Stress. Work is very stressful. I want to reach into the lives of my students and shake the stress out of them. I can't. I know that. No matter how hard I try I don't have the POWER to do that.

On the other hand, these are things that, technically, I CAN do. Right now they feel like wishes but I'll go with that for now.

I want to find it easier to remember that things I tell them and show them will need to be repeated over and over, by myself and others, before they sink in.

I want to remember that, for most of them, they WILL eventually sink in.

I want to remember that, like an ambulance driver, I am not the one who hurt these people but I am here to do no harm and to be part of the team that will patch up my customers so they have a better chance of making it in life.

I want to remember that sometimes things will not work out for them and that's sad but ok.

And finally, I want to remember that, as much as I love my students, a bad day in my field is never going to cause a plane to crash or a patient to die.

To quote James Taylor, "At night the stars put on a show for free." Don't call me tonight because I have reserve tickets for the best show not on earth.

Where is my list

I'm trying to put it together and write it down. Not happening today. Are things that bleak? I can ALWAYS make a list.

I was lamenting about young people who are stuck in hard times right now.

Wait for it... wait for it.

Nope. Back to the drawing board.

What's your biggest worry?

My plan for this blog was not to ask endless questions. I pictured myself diving in to the universe's most critical issues (or at least some important ones anyway) and putting in my two cents. Mostly, I've just asked more questions.

Here is another. What's your biggest worry? Would it worry me? Would it worry your neighbor? Would it worry anyone and everyone?

Last night I was torn up over which holiday parties I should go to. Yes, that's right; holiday parties. This issue has plagued me for years. Why does the world not just revolve around me in such a way that none of them overlap and I can do everything! Be everywhere! Not miss anything! Oh, and while you're at it, can it be arranged, please, so that my parties do not overlap with my kids' father's family's parties so that they don't have to worry either. Then we can all be happy in our partying. (Wait, one last thing. Someone provide me with enough money to buy presents for all these happy people.)

That's my biggest worry. Or was.

Now, I'm wondering if I have an extra winter hat at home for a student whose mother won't give him food. (We're working on food too.) I'm wondering where a very young mother and her daughter will sleep tonight.

Last week I wondered how these young people will find work. Now I'm wondering where they will find food and shelter.

True, these are not MY worries. Not really. But like a traffic cop I stand, directing people to the lesser of many evils, and the worries rub off. Sometimes a little, sometimes a little more.

In times like this, when things look bleak, I like to make a list. Let's start.

1. When these nightmares are over for these young people, they will have earned the right to stand tall and be proud of the accomplishments they have made.

Do you have a #2?

Inchworm, inchworm, measuring the merigolds...

How do you learn? Do you read? Do you listen? Do you watch? Do you need to try it?

Once you understand, how do you remember? Do you practice? Do you take notes? Do you just hope?

Some things that I learn, I already just know. In graduate school, all the education courses came easy to me. I would read a chapter and my response was, "Of course". Then I could apply what I read. In EMT class, though, my learning was hindered by fear.

Sitting among people who had only ever graduated from high school, I tried to figure out how an oxygen tank works. I was able to muster courage until the instructor reminded us that O2 tanks become missles when separated from their nozzle-thingys. Of course, doing so, for me, would have involved lifting the can (not an easy task for my weak self) and then dropping it just right so the nozzle thingy hit something hard, just right, and came off. Um, yeah. I quickly found a classmate to pair up with and observed as he effortlessly completed the activity. I won't even go into the lesson that involved pulling the gourney just PART way out of the ambulance, hooking the underneath thingy to the matching thingy on the edge of the rig, and bringing down the wheels so the patient (only imaginary for my first - and only - practice) didn't fall off onto the road.

Ok, so I'm good at some things and have to work harder (or pay someone) to do others. But I'm 41 and in a position to choose what I want to learn and what I can pass on (no pun intended). Not everyone is so lucky. What if the lesson you're not jiving with is the 6th grade curriculum, or at least the method by which it's delivered? What if the school you want to attend is $16,000 a year but the certificate you have when you're finished doesn't qualify you for a job that will pay well enough to cover the debt you incurred? In today's world, children are expected to speak, but what if learning to do so is really hard? What if it can't be done?

The inchworm reminds me that sixteen and sixteen are thirty two, and I can sing the alphabet song (and do) when I'm putting away folders of students whose last names begin with letters L-P. What about the rest? What about all the other things that we need to know that don't come with sing-song directions?

What then?

What are you dreaming about?

Do you have a list somewhere? In your head, on a slip of paper in your dresser drawer, on your fridge? Do you use the depths of your mind to dream about what ifs, or do you use them to perseverate and fret?

If someone gave you a million dollars right now, what would you do with it? Yesterday, I was settled into my comfy chair of responsibility, where I knew exactly how much money I owed to whom, how much the car I really liked years ago would cost to resurrect, and how often I would REALLY eat out if I had the money. (Um, every day of course.)

Then I met a man who, with his million dollars, would buy a submarine and explore ancient, underwater caves that used to be on dry land and certainly hold clues to a civilization that ceased to exist before the earth looked like the one we know today.

Please, sir, show me more.

So much to learn

What is a "mindless job"? An "entry-level" job? Is there such a thing as a job that requires no skill? A job that anyone could do?

You might say yes. You might say that scrubbing floors is not too hard, or that picking apples or brushing poodles could be done while asleep.

I say no. Every job requires skill. No job is completely accessible.

Before you can pick apples, you need to plan a healthy breakfast. You need to be able to get yourself out of bed, on time, every day. You need to select comfortable but sturdy shoes. You need to be able to receive and follow directions from your boss. Those directions may involve determining the amount of apples to pick. That involves, at the very least, counting, and at the most, determining their weight or volume.

You may need to select a certain quantity of each type of apple. Did you know that you could eat a different apple every day for 19 years and never eat the same kind twice? (http://www.sixwise.com/) They don't all grow around here, but there are 100 varities grown commercially in the U.S. Which is which? Could you tell them apart? I could not. You should not pick rotten apples, nor should you pick apples that are about to rot. Do you know the height from which you can safely drop an apple into a basket of other apples so that none bruise? I do not.

So apple pickers have to have apple skills. What about people skills? Maybe they pick all day totally alone, but what if they have to deal with other apple pickers? What if they need to help each other by holding ladders or sharing the work load? What if they have to work as a team?

Apple picking, brushing poodles... just think about those jobs. They are not no-skill positions.

Now, think about a young person you know. Maybe he is intelligent. Maybe she is strong. But maybe he can't get along with his peers. He picks fights. He can't shake the chip off his shoulder. He had a hard life. Maybe she is afraid of adults. Maybe she is argumentative. Maybe she is sickly.

How will these young people get jobs? How will they keep jobs, even ones that seem simple? How will they learn to feel good about themselves?

Who will help them to become successful? Will you?